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CNNNews
Posts:
Registered: 05-16-2007
Location:
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posted on 05-16-2007 at 10:21 |
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Asian Mail Order Brdies
HONG KONG, China (CNN) -- Online, thousands of mail-order bride sites are putting a bevy of Filipina dream girls just a mouse click away.
Internet proliferation is causing a surge in international dating services, and for more than 150,000 Filipina women it's also offering hope for a brighter future as a foreigner's bride.
A foreign future
Josie Valdez is one of hundreds of girls posted on the web. The 23 year-old Filipina domestic helper is looking for a potential partner and a better life abroad. Valdez, who has a child, says she has expectations of her future spouse.
"He must love me," she says. "They must accept me and at the same time my son too and where I come from. My values. My traditions."
For the men interested in ordering women like Valdez, online sites allow them to sift through thousands of pictures of potential brides. They then get in touch by paying for the address of the girls they like. A successful match often means a move abroad, but it's not as innocent as it seems.
A dangerous decision
In fact, following a potential spouse can be dangerous. Critics say online brides are often forced into domestic work.
"Mail order bride is like mail order slavery," says Cynthia Tellex, director of the Mission for Filipino Workers in Hong Kong. "It's modern day slavery. Many of them end up being battered."
Tellex also says the girls are often frustrated by clashing cultures.
"Many of them thought that like in the Philippines the man would surrender whatever earnings he has to the wife," she says. "It's not so in many countries. It's not the practice."
But many mail order brides suffer situations much worse with some even ending up dead. In 1995, Filipina Susana Remerata was murdered in Seattle by her husband Timothy Blackwell. She'd been pursuing a divorce after alleging abuse.
Recently in September last year, Anastasia King from Kyrgyzstan was also found dead in the U.S. Her husband has been arrested on first-degree murder charges.
Filipina leaders are aware of the dangers. Nearly ten years ago, then president Corazon Aquino banned agencies soliciting girls for marriage to foreigners. Violaters can face up to eight years in prison, but enforcement has proven difficult. The dating services often just set up shop outside the country.
Ever the romantic
Despite the horrific tales, women like Valdez still have hopes of finding a romantic future over the web. And although Valdez says she was scared the first time she signed up, she plans on keeping her photo online.
"One of my pen pals asked me what is my plan, then I told him if you're going to get me to the U.S. then that's fine," Valdez says.
The optimism held by mail order brides is understandable. Tellez says the women take a risk to escape poverty and are willing to try their luck even with the potential dangers.
"Whatever happened to Maria might not happen to Nana. That's how they think. 'I might be luckier than her,'" Tellez says.
For Valdez, that's exactly the kind of online luck she's counting on to bring her and her son a promise of better things to come.
"I always plan that after a few years in Hong Kong then I'm going to Canada as a stepping stone, and who knows, I'm going to the U.S. also," she says. "If others succeed, then maybe I can succeed. If it's a failure, than that's my fate."
Related sites:
loveme.com
foreignwomen.com
foreignladies.com
asiansingles.com
asianheart.com
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